July 2007

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Golf-Ball Bandit Strikes in Kansas City

On July 2, workers at the Sunflower Hills Golf Course in Bonner Springs, Kansas (just outside Kansas City) called police to report a theft.  Actually, 4,800 thefts.  The night before, someone had broken into the driving range and stolen approximately…


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Tourist Files Complaint Against Primate Thief

Kim Dang Hoon, a South Korean man traveling in India, has filed a complaint against a thief who stole his reading glasses.  Kim was visiting Varanasi, a Hindu holy city in the northern part of the country, when the theft…


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No Reconsideration of Verdict in Pants Case: Appeal Looms

No surprises here — Roy Pearson's motion for reconsideration of the verdict against him in the lost-pants case was swiftly denied by Judge Judith Bartnoff. She ruled on Monday that the 35 pages of his motion did not include any…


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A Wine So Good It May Turn Your Robbery Into a Group Hug

That might be a good new slogan for Chateau Malescot St. Exupery, a wine so good it helped turn a robbery last week into a group hug. A group of friends in Washington, D.C., were enjoying steaks, jumbo shrimp, fine…


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Canadians Get More Leeway to Joke in Airport-Security Lines

Last week, The Canadian Press (like our Associated Press, but Canadian) reported on a bulletin issued in May by the Canadian Air Transport Safety Authority that urged staff to use more discretion when reporting someone for making jokes about airport…


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Judge Pearson Ignores Standing Eight-Count, Staggers Back Into Ring

Apparently unable to live without being mocked daily, and desperate to not be reappointed as a D.C. administrative law judge, Roy Pearson has now asked Judge Judith Bartnoff to reconsider her dismissal of his $54-million-pants lawsuit.  In his motion for…


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British Judges and Lawyers No Longer Bewigged

Britain’s Lord Chief Justice, a position similar to our own Chief Justice, but lordier, announced today that judges and lawyers in that country will no longer be required to wear the white wigs that they have been practicing under since…


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Captain America to be Spared Jail Time

I like to salute great opening sentences when it’s appropriate, and especially when I’m not sure I could do any better.  So here’s this opening sentence, which began a story written on Tuesday by an unknown reporter at WFTV.com in…


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How to Avoid Jury Duty by Going to Jail Instead

Nobody really likes jury duty, but probably nobody doesn’t like it as much as Daniel Ellis.  Ellis was absolutely determined not to serve on a Massachusetts grand jury, apparently so determined that he wanted to go to jail instead. Ellis…