February 2008

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Bill Would Make KFC the “Official Picnic Food of Kentucky”

On January 18, Kentucky State Rep. Charles Siler introduced a bill that would designate Kentucky Fried Chicken (specifically, Original Recipe) as the state’s "official picnic food."  The provision itself is just one sentence, but the preamble offers some interesting details:…


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Mustache-Discrimination Case Reaches Indian Supreme Court

On Monday, February 11, justices of the Supreme Court of India heard argument in the case of a man who claims he was fired from his job at Indian Airlines because of his sizeable and "elaborate" handlebar mustache.  Initial reports…


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FBI Rejects Waterboarding In Favor of Starbucks

Writing on the New York Times website Tuesday, Mike Nizza discussed the revelation that in contrast to the CIA’s admitted use of techniques like "waterboarding" to try to get information out of Al Qaeda suspects at Guantanamo, FBI interrogators used…



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Overaggressive Handshake Lands Attorney in Jail

"It all stems from a handshake," said Gwendolyn Tuggle, who is defending attorney Kathy Brewer-Rentas against charges that she assaulted a federal prosecutor. "It was definitely more than a handshake," said court security officer Gilberto Pay, who witnessed the shake…


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“Puddles” Scandal Drives Mayor Out of Office

Grace Saenz-Lopez, the mayor of Alice, Texas, resigned on February 1 after admitting that she had dognapped a Shih Tzu named "Puddles" that she had been caring for. Not since Nixon’s "Checkers" speech has a stupidly named dog been so…


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Barack Obama’s Fight Against Vampires Set to Music

You may know that Barack Obama was president of the Harvard Law Review, but you probably didn’t know that he then became engaged in a fight against a secret society of student vampires.  Now that story is not only being…


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Ballot Proposal to Turn Alcatraz Into “Global Peace Center” Fails

Let’s take a short break from mourning for the shattered dream of a Romney presidency and remember another casualty of Super Tuesday: the Alcatraz proposal on the San Francisco ballot.  Proposition C would have changed city policy towards the island,…


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Snack Analysis Leads to Thief

It seems fairly common for burglars to treat themselves to a snack while they are burgling — occasionally one will even stop to make himself an omelette or something like that — but it may become less so if this…


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City Sues to Force Alleged Recycler to Keep Trash Service

Eddie House of San Carlos, California, was sued on January 22 by the city of San Carlos, California, for municipal code violations related to garbage.  The problem is apparently that Mr. House doesn’t generate any.  Garbage, that is. House, who…