August 2010

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Werewolf Declines Offer to Settle Lawsuit With Push-Up Contest

According to various sources, Twilight star Taylor Lautner, who apparently plays a werewolf or something like that, has refused an offer to settle a pending lawsuit by means of a contest to see who can do more push-ups. First of all,…


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Assorted Stupidity #4

From the Department of Good Ideas: “Owner of Ohio killer bear isn’t making safety fix,” Associated Press (Aug. 23, 2010).  What could happen? Another thing not to post on Facebook, if you are a juror: “Gonna be fun to tell…


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Burglar/Entrepreneur Breaks In, Holds Garage Sale

Police in Sarnia, Ontario, said they had arrested the man who broke into a home there in June and then spent the day holding a garage sale in which he sold off the owner's property. The homeowner, Greg Kemmis, was…


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$38 Quadrillion Demand is World’s Second Largest

Overlawyered reports, via the Provo Daily Herald, that a Las Vegas man is demanding 38 quadrillion dollars in a lawsuit that has something to do with a Utah mine.  John Theodore Anderson, who also refers to himself more impressively as…



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Nevada Legislator Proposes Bill on How to Pronounce “Nevada”

The Nevada legislature has started planning for its next legislative session, scheduled to begin in February 2010.  Currently, legislators are submitting "bill draft requests" for bills that they plan to introduce in the new session, and the one attracting the…


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Banana Seized

There are the usual unfortunate banana-related puns in the Seattle Post-Intelligencer's report on this incident, and I am sparing you those, but it does contain the excellent sentence: "The banana costume was seized as evidence." The incident also involved shotgun-brandishing and…


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City Council in Illinois May Ban Eye-Rolling

Sources reported recently that the city council of Elmhurst, Ill., had asked its attorney to research various definitions of "disorderly conduct," in the course of considering possible changes to rules of decorum in city council meetings. The move was prompted…


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Convicted Terrorist’s Demand for High-Fiber Diet is Rejected

Let's all shed a tear, shall we, for Terry Nichols, who is not only serving a life sentence for conspiracy and manslaughter in the Oklahoma City bombing but is also subjected to a diet unconstitutionally low in fiber. That's what Nichols argued, at…


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Geek Squad Sends Cease-and-Desist Letter to God Squad

The Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel reports that Best Buy, the owner of the "Geek Squad" trademark for its gang of computer troubleshooters who make house calls to do basic computer maintenance for what some (me, at least) consider utterly outrageous prices, has sent a cease-and-desist…