January 2013


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U.S. Pat. No. 430,388: The Crooked Baseball Bat

The inventor continued: The object of my invention is to provide a ball-bat which shall produce a rotary or spinning motion of the ball in its flight to a higher degree than is possible with any present known form of…


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Lawyer Offers Dream Job: You Pay to Watch Him Work

The legal job market is tough right now, and a lot of new lawyers are doing unpaid internships in order to get experience until things improve. But I wasn't aware that the profession had sunk low enough that we would…



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Scooby Doo, Where Are You? More Importantly, Where Are Your Pants?

From the police blotter, Fremont, California, January 8, 2013: IH # 13002139 Suspicious Circumstance  At approximately 4:25 a.m., witnesses called to report a suspicious male running through the parking lot of Lucky's on the 38400 block of Mowry Ave. They…


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Gang of Smurfs Facing Assault Charges

Police in Melbourne say they believe the four Smurf impostors, three of whom are seen below in a 7-Eleven security-cam photo, assaulted a man about 1 a.m. on December 16 after first asking him for a cigarette. A quick search…


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UPDATE: No, You Can’t Carpool With a Corporation

In a development that shocked no one, including him, Jonathan Frieman did not prevail yesterday in Marin County Superior Court. As I mentioned earlier, Frieman argues that he was not "alone" in his car when using the carpool-only lane, for…


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Can You Carpool With a Corporation?

No. On Monday, January 7, Jonathan Frieman will be paying $478 for the chance to test out his argument that if corporations are "people," he ought to be able to carpool with one. Actually, the $478 is how much he'll…


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Hipster Infestation Not “Emergency,” Say Police

I think we can all agree this is a serious problem, but it can only be addressed over time, by carefully cultivating the support of the general population. An occasional show of force may be useful for deterrence, and it…


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One-Armed Man Arrested for Clapping

Still cleaning out the draft folder, and it's worth mentioning this one just for the headline. It happened in Belarus in 2011, where dinosaurish old-school dictator Alexander Lukashenko was (as he still is) happily oppressing his people and presiding over the…