Joe Francis Sentenced to Nine Months in Jail

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francis cuffs

Hooray!
Original photo: TMZ)

Maybe that time period was selected because Joe doesn't seem to have finished gestating the first time around, or at least it wasn't successful, so now he can give it another shot. Fine, but it still seems awfully short given that the jury believed the three women who accused the "Girls Gone Wild" creator of false imprisonment and assault.

The conviction on the assault charge means the jury believed Francis choked one of the women and repeatedly slammed her head on the ground, which to me would qualify him for some serious dungeon time. He did get three years of probation, and because I have no doubt he will violate that probation, that makes me feel a little better.

Here's one reason I think that: he gets arrested all the time. (Slate also has a "brief and noxious history" of his legal troubles.) Here's another one: on Wednesday, the day after his conviction on these charges, Francis told The Hollywood Reporter that the jurors who convicted him were "retarded" and "should all be lined up and shot." (He later apologized.) Of course, he can say whatever he wants, but his big mouth continually gets him in trouble, and I doubt his jail time will cure him of that.

On the other hand, at least one commentator is convinced that Joe won't do any jail time at all. That commentator is Joe, who told TMZ he's appealing and said, "mark my words … I won't be going to jail" on these "absurd" charges.

So … mark his words.