Alternative Dispute Resolution

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Texas Votes to Secede

Well, not exactly. It would be more accurate to say that enough people have signed a petition in favor of allowing Texas to secede that the White House will have to issue a formal but in no way binding response…


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Mullet Guilty in Beard Case

Samuel Mullet, leader of what has been variously described as a "sect," a "cult," and an "Amish beard-cutting mob," was convicted on Thursday along with his children and 11 other family members and followers. The Mullet Mob was charged with federal hate…


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Second Man Beaten With Own Leg by Leg-Wielding Girlfriend

"I have never heard of someone beating someone with a prosthetic leg," said Kristy Harnish, a resident of Baker, Florida, after being asked by a reporter whether she had ever heard of that. That means she either doesn't read this…


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Don’t Mess With The Oatmeal

Matthew Inman, who runs the hilarious and extremely popular site The Oatmeal, announced the other day that he had been threatened by a lawyer representing FunnyJunk.com over this post in which he noted that FunnyJunk had reposted hundreds of his original…



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No Winner in Tomahawk-Speargun Battle

So you're driving along in your patrol car at the end of a long day when you notice a gentleman out on the lawn holding a tomahawk over his head. Upon further observation, you notice another gentleman on a nearby…


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Tear-Gas Filibuster Fails in South Korea

One of the many things I will be giving thanks for tomorrow is the South Korean legislature: Just to be clear, this wasn't tear gas "fired at S. Korea lawmakers" by some outsider – it was fired at them by…


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Homeowners Foreclose on Bank

It's sad, even if sometimes necessary, when the sheriff's deputy and moving trucks show up to seize assets because of an unpaid debt. Actually, though, I guess it's not that sad when it's the bank that's getting foreclosed on. According…


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Man Forced to Eat His Own Beard After Losing Lawn Mower Fight

From Lawrenceburg, Kentucky, comes this poignant story of a shattered friendship and a severed beard. James Hill and Troy Holt pleaded guilty to charges stemming from an incident last May in which they cut off Harvey Westmoreland's beard and forced him…