Attorneys in Action

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Judge Criticizes “Behemoth Pleadings”

Here are some words & phrases that you really don't want a judge to apply to anything you file: sprawling behemoth surplusage larded with brims with masquerading as voluminous breathtaking madness chokes the docket intended to overwhelm labyrinthian prolixity of…


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California Supreme Court Report

As I mentioned a few days ago, I argued a case before the California Supreme Court on Tuesday. I thought some of you might be interested to see the checklist I put together to help me prepare: I forgot to…


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Order on One Millionth Discovery Dispute

"Hey, guys, I think the judge is starting to lose patience with all the discovery disputes in this case." "Why do you say that?" Via Overlawyered, ABA Journal.


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Tom & Jerry Go to Court

Randy Spencer is an attorney who bills himself as "the only stand-up comic to specialize in insurance," and—oh, well, here he is performing at Caroline's, Mr. Skeptic. You don't think that's possible and yet here you are reading a "legal-humor…


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Harvard Grad Threatens Legal Action Over $4 Charge

According to Boston.com, Ben Edelman graduated summa cum laude from Harvard College, got a Ph.D. in economics from Harvard University and a law degree from Harvard Law School, and is now an associate professor at Harvard Business School. And yet he remains…


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What Is the Proper Format for a Citation to Buzz Lightyear?

I really have no idea, but this seems perfectly acceptable to me: I suppose you might also be wondering, "In what situation might I feel compelled to cite an animated action figure as an authority in one of my briefs?"…


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The Screaming Itches

Today's Quiz: "The Screaming Itches" would be: (a) unwise to bring up on a first date (b) a good name for a band (c) a bad excuse for failing to appear in court (d) all of the above Of course…


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“I Am Incompetent!” Lawyer Argues Unnecessarily

Last Friday, Dennis Hawver argued to the Kansas Supreme Court that he should not be disbarred for his representation of Phillip Cheatham in a 2005 trial. As you may suspect, that trial that did not go well for the defense. Certainly,…


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Order Requiring Socks

COMES NOW your humble correspondent and hereby gives notice of the fact that on August 25, 2014, in the case entitled In re Proper Courtroom Attire, then pending in the Circuit Court of Blackford County, Indiana, Judge Dean A. Young, presiding, the…


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In Which I Am Used to Embarrass Fox News

So this just happened on Twitter: And yes, that's me (on her television, apparently). The general theme of the thread that followed was something like "Fox News thinks this bird-poop thing is more important than #Ferguson!" It very well may,…