Elections & Voting

McCain Sued by Jackson Browne Over Use of “Running on Empty”

John McCain’s latest campaign ad continues the pop-culture theme of his Britney/Paris ad, this time using the song "Running on Empty" to mock Obama for proposing gas conservation through tire inflation.  That’s my song, said Jackson Browne, who is not…


German Legislation Would Give Infants Right to Vote

In what appears to be a true story and not one found in The Onion, sources report that a bill introduced in the German parliament would lower the voting age to zero. A spokesman for German embryos and fetuses said…


McCain Gets Endorsement From His Former Jailer

In a development that John McCain must have been very happy to hear about, the man who was in charge of the "Hanoi Hilton" while McCain was a prisoner of war has endorsed him for the presidency.  Tran Trong Duyet…



Kevorkian May Run for Congress

Dr. Jack Kevorkian, who was released on parole last year after serving eight years for second-degree murder, reportedly will run for Congress in a hotly contested House race.  A local paper reported on March 12 that Kevorkian had obtained the…


Florida Election Too Close to Call Because Nobody Voted

Tired of feeling like your vote doesn’t count?  Move to Prospect Bend, an unincorporated community in Broward County, Florida, near the town of Tamarac.  There, every vote counts — or every vote would count, if they could get one. Tamarac…



Candidate’s Platform: “I Don’t Plan to Do the Job”

Evidently a strong believer in smaller government, Ed Hamilton says that if elected he will shrink the size of the government in Kerr County, Texas, by at least one job—his own. Hamilton, a 77-year-old Republican, says that the position of…