State and Local Government

Town Says It Will Prosecute Official Who Did Something Useful

George Simolaris is a member of the Board of Selectmen (the town council) in Billerica, Massachusetts. According to him, some of the crosswalks around town have become unsafe because the paint has faded, and it's been taking forever to get…





Of Course We Have No Ticket Quotas, But ….

… you may wish to consider the following information in re: your salary. You won't be surprised to learn that Edmundson is a "city" in St. Louis County, about a ten-minute drive from Ferguson (might take a lot longer, of…



Whereas, South Florida Should Become the 51st State

That's the view of the City of South Miami, at least, or to be more specific it's the view of three of its five commissioners. By a 3-2 vote, the city commission has, for the second time, passed a resolution…


Judge Attacked by His Dad’s Pet Zebra [Updated]

The original headline, "Arkansas Judge Mauled by Family's Pet Zebra," was pretty good and has a nice rhythm to it, but I thought it was important to be clear that the zebra-owning family was his own. This wasn't just a…


Judge Wanted: Must Be Able to Read, Tell Time

A recent order from the Supreme Court of South Carolina (thanks, Anonymous) has updated the initial eligibility requirements for those who would like to be magistrate judges in that state. All applicants must now take and pass both the Wonderlic…


Another Zamboni DUI

I’m glad to see that The Smoking Gun‘s records are consistent with mine—we agree that this was the third known arrest for driving a Zamboni while intoxicated. I have a total of four Zamboni crimes, but one of them did not…