Quotes



Great Response to a “Prank” Cease-and-Desist Letter

Buzzfeed's question, "Is This The Best Response To A Cease And Desist Letter Ever?," prompted some debate this morning, although it is one of those debates that is not really necessary (which is why we had it on Twitter) because…


John McAfee: “I’m a Master at Sullying My Own Name”

Turns out that former software mogul and current oddball John McAfee successfully escaped the persecution (or prosecution, depending on who you believe) he was facing in Belize. See "If I Am Captured, This Blog Will Continue," Lowering the Bar (Dec….


“Mr. Burns” Presides Over Trial of “Bart Simpson”

Scientists appear to disagree as to whether the universe (or multiverse) is truly infinite in the sense that given enough time, all possible events will necessarily happen. On the other hand, maybe this is just semantics, given that, according to…



Geraldo “Truly Contemplating” Senate Run

Great news! Unless you are America. Geraldo Rivera said yesterday that he is considering a run for the Senate seat now held by Frank Lautenberg (D-NJ). Lautenberg, who is currently 89, has not yet said whether he will run for…


UPDATE: Justice Thomas’s Full Joke Revealed

Speaking of the Supreme Court, before the debut of the Hat the big news was that Justice Thomas had astounded the legal world by actually speaking during oral argument. As it was his first utterance in nearly seven years, pundits…