Angry about frivolous lawsuits, in particular one recently filed against a Nebraska judge, State Senator Ernie Chambers has decided to cut to the chase and take legal action against the source of all his irritation, namely God.
Chambers says he is making a point—that anybody can sue anybody—to protest what he says is a frivolous lawsuit against Lancaster County District Judge Jeffre Cheuvront. Cheuvront was in the news himself not long ago for granting a motion in limine to exclude the word “rape” from a rape trial. (He decided using that word would be unduly prejudicial.) The case ended in a mistrial, and the accuser in that case has sued Cheuvront, which is what Chambers is mad about. He filed his lawsuit even though the judge hearing that case has already suggested there is no legal basis for it.
Chambers called his lawsuit “appropriate,” at least in comparison to the accuser’s lawsuit. “People might call it frivolous,” he said, “but if they read it they’ll see there are very serious issues I have raised.”
Okay.
In the complaint, Chambers accuses Defendant of making “terroristic threats” and of directly and proximately causing “fearsome floods, egregious earthquakes, horrendous hurricanes, terrifying tornadoes,” and otherwise offering a lot of alliteration in the crackpot complaint pursuing his ponderous point.
Chambers asks the court to waive the personal-service requirement on the grounds that Defendant and His agents are present throughout Douglas County, but Plaintiff cannot determine which agent to properly serve. He says he has tried to serve Defendant by publication (apparently by shouting, “Come out, come out, wherever you are”) to no avail. The court is asked to take judicial notice of the fact that Defendant is omnipresent, and has actual notice of the action by virtue of being omniscient.
Plaintiff seeks a permanent injunction against Defendant.
It is unlikely that Chambers will succeed, partly because there is already a fair amount of precedent rejecting this kind of a claim. For example, in 1971, a federal court in Pennsylvania dismissed Gerald Mayo’s civil-rights action against Satan and various unnamed servants, on the grounds that there was no jurisdiction over the defendants. United States ex rel. Mayo v. Satan and his Staff, 54 F.R.D. 282 (W.D. Pa. 1971).
I found it comical that, in the Associated Press photo posted on CBS’s site, Chambers is posed in front of a fan so that he looks like he’s got a halo.
That probably makes him furious.
Ironically, and very probably making him even furiouser, Chambers also looks an awful lot like Morgan Freeman, who has actually portrayed God in at least one movie (Bruce Almighty).
I assume this is just another one of the Defendant’s little jokes.