After an investigation prompted by U.S. Senator Tom Coburn, the Social Security Administration has cleared adult baby Stanley Thornton Jr. of Coburn's allegations of disability fraud. Why was Senator Coburn bothering an adult baby? Because he saw the adult baby (or someone else saw him and told Coburn about it) on the National Geographic Channel show "Taboo."

Which had an episode about adult babies.

Anyway, when Coburn heard the story about the adult baby, he wondered why an adult baby would be getting Social Security disability checks, especially since the episode showed the adult baby building adult-sized baby furniture. A spokesperson said that the senator was puzzled by how a "grown man who is able to design and build adult-sized baby furniture is eligible for disability benefits." Yes, why doesn't he support himself selling adult-sized baby furniture on the adult-sized baby furniture market?

Coburn got the SSA to investigate, but he probably didn't like the results, because the SSA later wrote Thornton to say that it had confirmed that his "disability is continuing." As Thornton has emphasized on his website, which mostly has to do with the adult-baby lifestyle, he gets the disability payments for a variety of actual disorders including spinal injuries and post-traumatic stress, not for adult babyism. (And the TV people paid for the giant high chair, for Christ's sake.) Based on the SSA's letter, it looked into those disability claims again and evidently found them to be legit. Turns out the whole adult-baby thing was just a red herring.

I don't pretend to understand adult babies any better than I do baby adults. Both these kinds of humans should get away from me! But I think the most disturbing thing about this is that a U.S. Senator personally saw to it that a citizen was investigated by federal agents, probably based solely on what somebody told him they saw a while back on the National Geographic Channel.

Senator Coburn, leave the adult baby alone!