This Particular Circus Act Was Not a Crowd-Pleaser

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This happened:

Two Border Patrol agents have been put on paid leave after audience members complained they engaged in a sex act while attending a Cirque du Soleil theater performance in San Diego County.

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[According to a witness,] the pair appeared to be engaging in oral sex. The witness, who asked not to be named, said she told the two to stop but they didn’t. She said two children turned around and also saw the couple in the compromising position. The male agent gave one of the children a high-five as this was happening, the witness said.

I think we're missing a couple of critical facts there: (1) how old were these "children" and (2) who initiated the high five? Sure it would be wrong to tap a young child on the shoulder, call attention to yourself and demand a high five, but a 17-year-old guy is very likely to see this as an impressive "achievement" and offer the high five himself. Then it would just be polite not to leave the guy hanging. Don't judge until all the facts are in.

The couple did stop (speaking of being left hanging) when others also complained and an usher approached. The two apparently stayed for the remainder of the show anyway, but the male agent was clearly left in a foul mood; as the crowd was exiting he "allegedly punched one of the complaining patrons in the face," an officer said.

"My vision went black and that was the last thing I felt [except for the feeling of an attorney's business card being pressed into my hand]," the complaining patron said.

The agents were off-duty and not in uniform, and the fact that they were Border Patrol agents (who you'd think would have a little more respect for boundaries) did not affect how the matter was handled, police said. The puncher was cited for misdemeanor battery, and his companion was, not that surprisingly, cited for public intoxication. The Customs and Border Patrol agency released a statement saying that it stresses honor and integrity in every aspect of its mission and blah blah blah, and said the agents had been assigned "administrative duties" for now.