Assorted Stupidity #93

There’s been another maple-syrup heist in Quebec, although this time it involved a mere 20,000 liters of the precious tree juice (about $150k worth), and the Global Strategic Maple Syrup Reserve was not breached. See, e.g., “Who Stole the Global Strategic Maple Syrup Reserve? And How?” (Sept. 14, 2012) (2.7 million liters); see also “Canada’s Long National Nightmare Is Over: Last Maple-Syrup Pirate Arrested” (Sept. 23, 2013) (for the rest of that saga). These thieves used a truck to steal a container bound for Japan, in case you thought this wasn’t actually a global strategic issue.

Eugene Volokh reports (also here) that the ABA has adopted a model rule that would make it “professional misconduct” to say anything that “manifests bias or prejudice towards others” while engaged in “conduct related to the practice of law.” Bias: bad. Prejudice: also bad. But as Eugene explains, there are already laws against discrimination, and also a First Amendment that protects the right to say even stupid and hateful things. All this was apparently explained to the ABA, but to no avail. If only its members had some sort of training in analyzing legal and constitutional issues.

Richard Lee was back in court recently to demand records he says will prove his theory that Kurt Cobain was murdered (it’s not clear by whom). The report describes Lee as “a self-proclaimed independent investigative journalist who many call an obsessed conspiracy theorist.” Which is he? Well, according to one of these articles, “even other Kurt Cobain conspiracy theorists think Lee is nuts,” so that seems like an important data point.

Katie in Australia writes, “If you were thinking it’s been too long since there was CCTV footage of a bumbling Aussie thief, sweet relief is at hand.” She wasn’t wrong.

No CCTV footage, but she also sent this item about two thieves in Perth who tried to rob a pharmacy, but one sprayed himself in the face with pepper spray and the other one cut himself while trying to threaten the victim with a knife. Police said they fled after having grabbed only sleep-apnea masks, which is probably not what they were after.

Mark in Massachusetts wrote to say that he had spotted one of those “legal name fraud” signs, but this one was strapped to the front of somebody’s bike. He speculated it might have been performance art, but “the bike’s owner wasn’t around to ask.”