I'll be in Chicago during the week of April 22 to speak at a law firm's annual gathering there. (The guy who usually performs for them had an "accident.") This will be a Lowering the Bar presentation, and if you want to know what one of those is like, I guess you're new here so please look around before doing something you might regret.

If you have any interest in having me give such a presentation to your group (law firm, law school, bar association, barbershop quartet, whatever) during that week, and your group is located there in Chicago, which is the place that I will be at that time as I mentioned just a second ago, that would be a good time for me to give that presentation because we will be in the same place geographically. Please let me know as soon as you can so I can figure out the schedule.

Sadly I must reserve the right to reject invitations to speak for any reason or no reason at all, but having said that, I am not at all likely to reject an invitation (schedule permitting) except those from one or more of the following groups:

• the Illinois Nazi Party
• the Illinois Communist Party
• any chapter of the Orly Taitz Fan Club
• the Chicagoland Lion-Meat Gourmet Association
• Dung Haulers of America Local #270
• Lunatics Anonymous
• People for Better Thighs
• [redacted],
• the National Triangular Flapjack Association, or
• the Transportation Security Administration,

none of which I want anything to do with.