Assorted Stupidity

Assorted Stupidity #60

Faced with drug-possession charges, said the prosecutor in this case, the defendant claimed that police had planted the drugs in his car. Well, that's certainly possible. He continued, "Of the drugs stuck to his testicles, [defendant] denied any knowledge." Well, that certainly isn't….


Assorted Stupidity #59

California has a new law that makes it illegal for any food employee to touch ready-to-eat food with bare hands. That means gloves, which sounds okay in general but there's no exemption for people like bartenders and sushi chefs, who I…


Assorted Stupidity #57 [Correction]

Do you have a right to read the laws that govern you, or is that a privilege you should have to pay for? PublicResource.org thinks it's a right, and has been publishing digital versions of various laws and codes not…


Assorted Stupidity #56

Got behind on posts this week because on Thursday I gave a presentation in Santa Monica on legal-ethics issues that arise in connection with electronic discovery. (Okay, I was there as moderator/jokester and the panelists were the ones with knowledge,…


Assorted Stupidity #54 [Updated]

Category: Things Left Behind at Crime Scene That Guarantee Conviction. Current Leader: Guy Who Left Behind a Copy of His Birth Certificate and a Letter From His Mom. Hard to see anyone beating that but I wouldn't rule anything out….


Assorted Stupidity #53

The guy who convinced his 16-year-old nephew to walk around dressed like a terrorist, complete with grenade launcher (see "GOOD IDEA: Test Police Response Time by Walking Around With an RPG" (Sept. 28, 2012), has been convicted of endangerment and…


Assorted Stupidity #52

When attorneys get carried away at a press conference: "I have a client who is not only not guilty, he is truly 100% innocent," said the attorney for the man initially charged with sending ricin to federal officials. She was…


Assorted Stupidity #50

Have said it before, but people still aren't getting it: never bring a sharpened antler to a gunfight. Winner, Least Necessary Sentence in Article Linked Above Item (tie): "Witnesses said the man might be under the influence of drugs" and…


Assorted Stupidity #48

A former beauty-pageant contestant pleaded guilty to participating in a riot that followed the 2011 Stanley Cup final. What's that you're asking? Had she been voted "Miss Congeniality" in that pageant? Indeed she had. If you are fighting charges that…


Assorted Stupidity #46

Yes, it's frustrating when the bank teller screws up a simple request—"give me $20,000," for example—but you shouldn't really complain about being shortchanged if the money you demanded wasn't yours. A 28-year-old man was arrested in October after he demanded…