Brilliant Arguments


“Twilight” Fan Admits She Lied About Vampire Attack

One more tale of forbidden love and then we say farewell to Valentine's Day for another year. According to Florida police, a 15-year-old girl has admitted she was not attacked and bitten while she was jogging, as she initially told…


Man Points Finger at Brain in Parking-Rage Incident

A British man who attacked a car with an axe and then set fire to it blamed his brain for the incident, according to a January 27 report in the Herald Express. The brain's alleged involvement was especially surprising because the…




School District Ends Ban on Dangerous Writing Implements

Good news — the superintendent of the North Brookfield School District in Massachusetts has announced that students are again free to carry their own writing implements, ending a short-lived ban on that practice. He said the ban on this dangerous…


Sunshine No Longer Free, Says Sun’s New Owner

Angeles Duran did not say how much she was going to charge people for using the Sun, but she did confirm that she owns it, that her claim is legally valid, and that she will be charging a fee.  Duran, a…


Odd Election Results

Various Democrats and Republicans and so forth won their various races and blah blah blah. Here are a few possibly more interesting results from yesterday's elections. Rhode Island voters rejected a measure that would have changed the state's name, which…


Quaids: Lohan, Spears, Gibson Also in Danger From Star Whackers

Randy and Evi Quaid appeared on "Good Morning America" on Monday to discuss their allegations that they and other celebrities are being victimized by a shadowy group of embezzlers, assassins, or possibly embezzling assassins, who they refer to as the…


McDonald’s Ordered to Pay Fat Manager

Via the Law360 service I learned that a judge in Brazil has ordered McDonald's to pay a former manager $17,500 based on his allegations that he gained 65 pounds during his years with the company, due to such dastardly corporate practices as offering employees…