Brilliant Arguments

Assorted Stupidity #7

When I suggested the other day that Charlie Sheen should consider the Tourette’s defense, I didn’t have all the facts. So unless there is some evidence that Tourette’s syndrome could cause someone to do cocaine, bring a porn star to…



Town’s Lawn-Mowing Requirement Held Not Equivalent to Slavery

The excellent Legal Blog Watch reports that the Georgia Supreme Court has rejected an argument that an ordinance requiring citizens to mow their lawns constituted an imposition of "involuntary servitude" of the kind prohibited by the 13th Amendment to the United…




Update: Caffeine/Sleep-Deprivation Defense Fails

Reports last week were that the lawyer for Woody Will Smith would argue that Smith was not responsible for murdering his wife because he had done so while suffering from a "brief psychosis" due to lack of sleep and heavy…


Not Guilty by Reason of Caffeine

Reports today say that a 33-year-old Kentucky man will argue in his murder trial this week that he should be found not guilty of killing his wife because he was under the influence of caffeine at the time. Woody Smith's…


$38 Quadrillion Demand is World’s Second Largest

Overlawyered reports, via the Provo Daily Herald, that a Las Vegas man is demanding 38 quadrillion dollars in a lawsuit that has something to do with a Utah mine.  John Theodore Anderson, who also refers to himself more impressively as…


Convicted Terrorist’s Demand for High-Fiber Diet is Rejected

Let's all shed a tear, shall we, for Terry Nichols, who is not only serving a life sentence for conspiracy and manslaughter in the Oklahoma City bombing but is also subjected to a diet unconstitutionally low in fiber. That's what Nichols argued, at…


Fools Convicted

Conviction affirmed, technically, but I liked the sound of this headline better. Kurt Johnson and Dale Heineman were accused of scamming homeowners by promising to get rid of their mortgage debt for a fee.  They did get rid of it,…