“Inchworm Bandits” Are Either Idiots or Comedy Geniuses
It’s a fine line sometimes. Rarely, but sometimes.
Criminal Mind, The
“Worst Robbers in Belgium” Agree to Come Back at Closing Time
More to steal that way, you see.
Another Attempted Water Escape Fails
The article calls this a “watery elude,” which it wasn’t.
Guy With Axe Embedded in Roof of Car Gets Probation
The thing with the axe isn’t illegal, and the other stuff deserves more than probation.
Spaghetti Arsonist in a Bull Onesie? I’m Guessing It’s Florida
Featuring a local news clip that is worth your time.
Fleeing Suspect Apprehended by His Car
Is there video? Of course there’s video.
Sospechosos Con 4,000 Kilos de Naranjas No Saben de Dónde Vinieron
But coincidentally, four metric tons of them were missing from a nearby warehouse.
Suspect’s “Toilet Strike” Enters Third Week
His long-term strategy is frankly unclear.
Suspect Who Asks About His “Other Murder Case” Is Charged With That One, Too
“Hm, well, I don’t see anything else on the docket, but I imagine the detectives here would be happy to look into it.”
Suspect Steals Mortuary Van, Finds Body Inside, Returns Both
Always check the back seat.