Of Course There Was a Comma in “I Want a Lawyer Dog”
No, not between “I” and “Want a Lawyer Dog,” as if he were referring to himself, Mr. Want a Lawyer Dog. Please try to take this more seriously. Dog.
Criminal
Bad Places to Hide: Atlantic Ocean
Granted, you could conceal yourself in it if you really wanted to, but that probably involves dying.
Insufficient-Burping Defense Fails to Defeat DUI Charge
In which evidence of three burps is held adequate to support a conviction.
A Few Signs That Martin Shkreli Might Be In Some Trouble
Although his smirk has not yet wavered.
Escape Charge Dismissed Because State Didn’t Prove Prison’s Location
Prosecutors forgot to call any witnesses who knew which county it’s in.
Man Upset With $190 Ticket for Having His Snake Off Leash
You can’t set your snake free in a public park. At least not in Sioux Falls, South Dakota.
Suspect Steals Mortuary Van, Finds Body Inside, Returns Both
Always check the back seat.
Police: Burglars Not Hard to Track in Snow
Or smart enough to wait for spring.
“Spelling Bee Bandit” Arrested for String of Roberies
I hope you realize that’s how HE spelled it.
“Downton Abbey” Congressman’s Indictment Is a Hoot
At least he didn’t delete any emails. (He actually said that.)