Rectal Smuggler Won’t Know Doody’s Position Until November
I’m a grown man, but I’m also on vacation.
Criminal
Defendant Votes on His Own Indictment
Grand jury proceedings are secret, so I guess we’ll never know which way he voted.
Defendant Says His Lawyer Lied; Asks Him for Help Remembering What the Lies Were
Oddly, the lawyer failed to identify any of the alleged misrepresentations.
Missouri’s Governor Appointed to Represent Criminal Defendant
He is a lawyer, but apparently he’s not willing to serve.
Judge Challenges Defendant to Knit Her Way Out of Jail
A sentence that has been called “crewel and unusual punishment,” though not by me.
Pond Ruins Yet Another Getaway
A story that’s a little more mysterious than it sounds.
Is It Illegal to Make Your Spouse Ride on the Roof of the Car?
Are you currently in a parade?
Bad Places to Hide: Island in Alligator-Infested Lake
It does make it a little harder for the cops to follow you, but other issues still make this a bad choice.
Man Arrested 14 Years After Failing to Return Terrible Video
If he watched this movie, he’s the real victim.
Spa Bandit Update
For no good reason at all, an update on the criminal career of one Marshall G. Wolbers, formerly known as the “Spa Bandit.”