Trail of Chewing-Tobacco Spit Leads to Thieves
Not directly, but still.
Criminal
Muslim Clerics Issue Cell-Phone Fatwa
A panel of Muslim clerics in northern India have issued a fatwa prohibiting the use of cellphones, at least in certain un-Islamic ways. If they will extend this to the BlackBerry, I might be willing to convert. A fatwa, you may…
Will Perry Mason Defend Himself?
The Associated Press reported yesterday that Perry Mason had been charged with felony barratry in Texas, a crime that carries a penalty of up to ten years in jail. "Barratry" is the dastardly crime committed when a non-attorney solicits clients for a…
Rambo Cupid Fires Arrows Around Minnesota Neighborhood
Police in Burnsville, Minnesota, said that Kyle Fletcher went out onto his patio deck on April 3 with a powerful compound bow and fired several arrows into neighboring homes in an effort to impress a woman. Police found arrows embedded in…
Fly With Your Pants Down, Lose Your License, Judge Rules
An administrative-law judge has ruled that the FAA properly revoked the license of a man who allowed a sex act to be performed upon him as he flew a helicopter around San Diego. The judge cited the pilot's likely inability…
UPDATE: Former SF Official Gets Maximum Despite Brain Claims
Former SF supervisor Ed Jew was sentenced today to 64 months in jail by a judge in SF federal court. Judge Susan Illston apparently rejected the claim that the defendant had been afflicted by childhood head injuries that first manifested…
Attorney for SF Official Says Extortion Scheme Caused by Childhood Head Injuries
Here's an argument that Rod Blagojevich might want to take notes on, now that he has been very unsurprisingly indicted. Former San Francisco supervisor Ed Jew (who I'm going to refer to as "Ed" here in hopes of not appearing in…
Madoff Pleads Guilty, Goes Directly to Jail
“Loud laughter” isn’t what you hope to hear when your defense attorney speaks.
“We Will Get You,” Store Promises Vinegar Thief
The owner of the Newport Avenue Market in Bend, Oregon, is fed up with whoever has been stealing bottles of expensive balsamic vinegar from the market for over a year now. This is why a sign now hangs in the relevant…
Official Suspected of Corruption Just Because He Owned Estate, Jet, Helicopter, Tiger, Blah, Blah, Blah
None of the evidence against Juan Antonio Roca proved he engaged in any wrongdoing, said his lawyer, who did not explain how a city planner making $150,000 a year could afford two very large estates in Spain. Also not explained by him: the…