Government


Batman Eludes Phoenix Police

The Associated Press reported on Wednesday that three Phoenix-area schools were put "on lockdown" after a middle-school student reported seeing a person dressed as Batman run across the school grounds, jump over a fence and disappear into the desert.  The…


Manila Airport Security Apprehends German Pants-Dropper

Upgraded security procedures at Manila International Airport are being credited for the apprehension of Hans Jurgen Oskar von Naguschewski, a 66-year-old German tourist who got so fed up with it that he dropped his pants before walking (or more likely…



WARNING: “Welsh Dragon Sausages” May Not Contain Real Dragon

In November, the Trading Standards department for Powys County, Wales, forced a sausage manufacturer to change the label of its "Welsh Dragon"-brand spicy sausage, on the grounds that the label was misleading because the product did not contain real dragon….


NY Mayor Bloomberg Reveals Existence of “Batphone” to Senate

Testifying on Tuesday before the Senate Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee, New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg told committee members that he has a "very important secure phone" in his kitchen at home for use in case of emergencies.  Specifically,…


Why Not to Slap Fellow Airline Passengers, Reason #1

Wanting to slap fellow passengers (and their crying babies) is entirely understandable, but here’s a reason to stop and think before you do it.  A US Airways passenger was arrested yesterday after he threw a "mid-air temper tantrum" on a…


San Francisco OKs Pot, Bans Styrofoam

Depending on your viewpoint, this symbolizes everything that’s wrong with San Francisco, or everything that is so great about it. On Tuesday, the San Francisco Board of Supervisors voted to outlaw the use of styrofoam and similar products, and (according…


Andy Griffith Running for Sheriff in Wisconsin

In what seems like an unfair move — how could you not vote for "Andy Griffith" to be your sheriff? — a music store owner in Grant County, Wisconsin, changed his name from "William Fenrick" to "Andy Griffith" upon entering…


Toga Party Attendance is Critical in Abu Ghraib Defense

Lt. Col. Steven Jordan is currently on trial for 12 charges relating to the torture — sorry, "maltreatment" — of detainees at Abu Ghraib prison.  His defense attorneys have argued that Jordan was actually not in charge of the interrogation…