UPDATE: Transcript of Witchcraft Resolution Hearings Posted
In which the “burn the witch” scene from Monty Python is actually discussed.
State and Local Government
Youth Rights Under Siege in Midwest
In addition to the continuing War on Low Pants, about which I will report again in the near future, other recent legislative developments in the Midwest are threatening the rights of young people. In Arkansas, the right of toddlers to…
Southerners Fear War Between the States
In case you missed it, February 27th was "Give Our Georgia Friends a Drink Day," as proclaimed by Ron Littlefield, mayor of Chattanooga, Tennessee. Littlefield said he was concerned about them because the Georgia Legislature had passed a resolution expressing…
Politician Reinstated After Scandal
A politician who recently lost his job after a scandal has been reinstated, and his record will be cleared, officials said today. Thanks for reading, Client-9, but it’s not you. Eighth-grader Michael Sheridan, of New Haven, Connecticut, was suspended and…
Bill Would Make KFC the “Official Picnic Food of Kentucky”
On January 18, Kentucky State Rep. Charles Siler introduced a bill that would designate Kentucky Fried Chicken (specifically, Original Recipe) as the state’s "official picnic food." The provision itself is just one sentence, but the preamble offers some interesting details:…
City Sues to Force Alleged Recycler to Keep Trash Service
Eddie House of San Carlos, California, was sued on January 22 by the city of San Carlos, California, for municipal code violations related to garbage. The problem is apparently that Mr. House doesn’t generate any. Garbage, that is. House, who…
Missouri City Council to Consider Ban on Swearing, Bar Dancing
Saying that legislation is necessary because the historic downtown area "gets a little too lively on some nights," City Councilman Richard Veit of St. Charles, Missouri (a St. Louis suburb) has proposed a measure that would ban swearing and other…
Missouri City Joins Campaign Against Saggy Pants
Earlier this month, the Board of Aldermen in Pine Lawn, Missouri, voted to impose fines for wearing pants that sag below the waist, joining several other communities bravely fighting this scourge of modern society. Pine Lawn is a small community…
Colbert Is Tied in Election for Conservation District Board, But Cannot Serve
Stephen Colbert’s run for president ended earlier this month after Democrats in South Carolina refused to put him on the primary ballot. Now, a second disappointment: he will not be allowed to participate in a runoff for a seat on…
NYC Councilman Proposes Legislative Ban on Pigeon Feeding
Fed up with the government’s failure to act against the pigeon menace, New York City Councilman Simcha Felder said yesterday that he would introduce legislation that would ban pigeon feeding in the city and impose fines of up to $1,000….