“The Singing Was Quite Beautiful But Was Preventing Me From Hearing the Evidence”
Singing in court is rarely appropriate, even if you have a good voice.
Trials
The Defendant Seems to Have Left, Your Honor
Here's a criminal-defense strategy you might not have considered: just get up and walk out. They certainly won't be expecting that. And probably for that reason, it's worked at least three times. At least temporarily. The first example I know of was…
The Screaming Itches
Today's Quiz: "The Screaming Itches" would be: (a) unwise to bring up on a first date (b) a good name for a band (c) a bad excuse for failing to appear in court (d) all of the above Of course…
“MURDER” Tattoo Update: It’s to Be Turtlenecks in August
Reuters reports today that Jeffrey Chapman, the gentleman who, in one of history's great ironies, unwisely had "MURDER" tattooed on his neck at some point only to later be charged with that very crime, will not be allowed to bring…
All Work and No Play Makes Court Reporter a Dull Boy
He didn't go with that exact phrase, as far as we know, but according to the New York Post (thanks, Matt), a court reporter in Manhattan has been accused of going off the rails in dozens of cases, typing gibberish or random…
Joe Francis Sentenced to Nine Months in Jail
Hooray!Original photo: TMZ) Maybe that time period was selected because Joe doesn't seem to have finished gestating the first time around, or at least it wasn't successful, so now he can give it another shot. Fine, but it still seems…
Defendant Claims His Underwear Is 50 Years Old
Faced with evidence that he and his family lived in luxury on a politician's salary, Bo Xilai insisted in court that he is a simple man, according to reports yesterday. Bo, who was formerly head of the Communist Party in…
“The Super Bowl of Fortuneteller Fraud Cases”
AKA “Operation Crystal Ball.”
Judge Holds Himself in Contempt for Cellphone Violation
"I thought it would never happen to me," said Judge Raymond Voet, who is the chief judge in Ionia County, Michigan. He was referring to the fact that his cellphone made noise in court on April 13 during a trial….
TIP: Hard to Argue Ineffective Assistance of Counsel If You Represented Yourself
I guess it might literally be hard to argue this, if you aren't good at making arguments. But I really meant that it's hard to argue it successfully. According to the Memphis Commercial Appeal, which is what they call their…